http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=112301498&ft=1&f=1001

i was on my way in this morning and i was listening to the radio and caught the end of this Horrific story. i mean there are MANY terrible stories out there that probably surpass this but it was what i heard this morning that upset me. What the fuck is wrong with this world?!! i started to tear up when i was listening to the radio djs discuss it but they didnt for long. just to announce the story and that was it. i wonder if someone on the other side of the glass was motioning for them to move on from it. WTF?! let them talk about it. and its just bc... "well, it makes the listeners uncomfortable." ummmm.... ok then let them change the fucking channel then if they dont care enough about our future to listen!!!! i am just so angry about the way our future is going. i was looking at another users blog yesterday and she updates it with the stories that are going on concerning incidences of sexual abuse. i do realize that reading the stories is not helping me to move past what happened bc it just brings the vomit back into my throat followed by anger, but it is just so awful and sick. and what is soooo fucking alarming is that it is pastors, TEACHERS, police officers, baby sitters, etc. i understand that pedafiles are so manipulative and choose the path that is trusted so that they have easier access to children but WTF are we doing as a society?! we let anyone be a teacher which is sooooooo messed up! does anyone out there have 1/2 a brain?! teachers should be in therapy ALL the time and should be psychologically evaluated and they should not be able to teach if they have had any experiences with sexual abuse. now that one is incredibly hard for me to say bc i would LOVE to be a teacher and i know bc of my past that would leave me out of doing what i would love to do. but if it means that a child would be given a chance at a "normal" life that didnt have the nightmares of sexual assualt their entire life afterwards then i am willing to give up my want to be a teacher. i am just so angry this morning. i will breathe and eat my banana choco chip cake from starbucks along with my venti black tea lemonade (sweetened) and just try to be for now. i wish that somehow i could just change things. i dont know my purpose for being on this planet but i have a determination in me to make it worth something! i do tell people about my experience growing up... my therapist said that i shouldnt because i am making it like am i the victim all of the time and i have to get away from that but that is NOT why i tell people what happened. i tell them so that they are better informed and to open this shit up so that is STOPS being something hush hush. this is so fucking serious and we need to get a hold of it! there is no reason for this to continue and by allowing people that have had a bad sexual experience growing up to be in a position that they are around children is NOT acceptable. especially knowing what we do. and knowing that molestation and sexual abuse is most likely a learned behavior. so what the hell... lets just keep passing it down by allowing people with this past to be in trusted positions and taking care of our future everyday. lets let them be in position that children idiolize, like police officers. i dont know a little boy yet that hasnt once growing up didnt say i want to be a policeman. lets let these men/women preach in our churches and pray over our future as they drag them into darkness and hell. what the hell... y not?! fuckers!