"my little girl" tim mcgraw

Stepfather...
after some while now since ur last email to me i decided to write u back. it has taken me awhile to get back to u bc i cant think of anything nice to say in response. i am not sure y i tried to contact u after such a long time. just another one of those i will try to forgive and see if anything has changed. it hasnt. on ur side that is. but since i am taking the time to write u back i am also going to take the time to tell u how i really feel about everything. after talking to u on the phone and reading ur email i cant get over how u still insist of treating me and my brother and sister. u hv bn in my life since i was 6 yrs old and still refuse to accept me as ur child. but yet u had no problem discipling and making me follow ur rules. u refer to ur children as "my anna" and their kids as "my abi." and the pics that u send me back of ur grandchildren from "ur" children are when they are only weeks old and they are now almost 3. haha u dont even know ur grandchildren from "ur" children. do u not understand that u r the ONLY father that we have ever really known? we have no other father figure. and the only father that we have had to know in our life was u who was abusive emotionally and physically. and u act as if we owe u an apology. what is that?! we didnt take television cable and beat u with it. we didnt hit u in the back of the head when ever we felt the need to do so. we didnt break brooms across ur back. we didnt drag u through bedroom windows and make u swallow ur tongue. we didnt take ur face and almost drown u in the shower head. we didnt smash all of ur cds bc we didnt like what u were listening to. we didnt beat ur mother around while we were drunk and not drunk. we didnt read ur journal and thoughts allowed to u to embarrass and humiliate u for the way u were feeling. we didnt call u names like "bitch, asshole, bastard, etc." there is more trust me. yet u still act as though me, my brother, and my sister owe U something!! i feel sorry for you. and u say that u cry bc of the sadness u may have caused ur own children between u and my mother. u didnt beat them like u did us. if only ur "real" son knew the pain u caused us while were growing up before they came around. the drugs and alcohol that we watched u consume daily. i am sick of letting black holes like u just walk around and blame innocent people for ur problems. how does a 6, 3, & 2 year old cause a grown ass man pain?! how do they cause a grown ass man to go out drinking and doing drugs?! did u think we enjoyed u beating on us and causing us emotional pain? do u think we liked watching u beat our mother? do u think we like being locked in the closest listening to u laugh outside while holding the door closed? do u think we liked hearing our mother screaming from behind the closest door begging to be let out? what the fuck is wrong with u?! what the fuck is wrong with your fucking screwed up twisted shity mind???!!!! and u hv the nerve to say negative things about my husband? the only man to stay in my life for 15 years and never call me a bad name, always support anything i put my mind to doing, take care of my daughter everyday, love me no matter what i am going through, and NEVER EVER raise his hand to me!! and u dare say negative things about him to me. u wanna know the reason u cry? i am telling u now y u do. if u hv bn trying to block it out i am hear to remind u of the bastard u really are. dont run from it bc i will never go away. if anyone deserves an apology it is me, my brother, my sister, and my mother. NOT YOU! u r rotting in ur own shame today and u will until u die. and that is bc u refuse to own up to ur part in the way that we are today. and the struggles that we have to overcome today with our addictions that were learned from you. u should apologize to us and beg us for forgiveness. u dont treat children like shit bc they are smaller than u and less powerful. children should be treated with the same respect that an adult is given. and they should be loved and cared for more that an adult is loved or cared for. i am done trying to make things better between us. i am finished trying to let black holes back into my life. i have a child to think about now and anyone that causes me pain is someone that could potentially cause my daughter pain. and those people will not be a part of my life any longer. even if the pain they cause is not directly to my daughter i know that she will see it through me and i will not allow her to see me suffer. she deserves the best life that i can give her. not a life like the one u thought that we deserved. my father was a fuckerhead... NOT his children. i am so very glad that me, my brother, and my sister are not fuckerheads like u and my father. that is something that we left with the both of you. to rot with the both of you. not our children. and let me warn u about something else... fuck my brother up right now and i can promise u that u will never speak to him again. i cant believe that he is giving u the time of day right now without any apology for the horrible things u put him through. and he doesnt come out and talk about any of it. just keeps it locked up. just know that if u mess up again he will not ever speak to u again bc it really is one chance and he is done with u.
goodbye fuckerhead